My friend Amy has "snuggle nights" with her kids - each of them has their own room, so each night the kids take turns having private time with Mom or Dad to read, snuggle, and talk about anything that the child wants to talk about. She said it is something that each of her children really looks forward to. Another friend of ours, Aubrey, has started this too, and on her children's snuggle nights she rubs their feet or back with essential oils. They love it! (who doesn't like a massage?)
My kids share rooms, so I've been experimenting with how I'll start this. We first tried "stay up late" nights, where the child could stay up later than the other kids downstairs and play a board game with one of us, write in journal together, or snuggle an talk on the couch. But that didn't work yet cause the kids all stay up too late as it is. We might try that during the summer though. After talking to Aubrey, I thought about doing back rubs and have started that, giving back rubs to the kids - one a night, taking turns, as we read scriptures. Usually it's just Ethan that requests and sometimes receives backrubs, but he asked so often, when I'd tell him no, the other kids who had never gotten back rubs, didn't bother asking cause I'd already told Ethan no. Anyway, it's been working great for us, a little bit of special attention for each kid, and Ethan doesn't have to ask an I don't have to tell him or anyone "no" cause they know that I will each night and that they each have a turn coming up.
Also, I've started taking one child a week with me when I run errands, which is their one on one time with me. Corey's one on one time with the kids is Thursday, so it works out well that they each have something to look forward to about every 3 weeks. When they go shopping with me, I buy them their incentive that they are working toward if they've earned it, or a treat or small surprise if they haven't earned their incentive (earned by doing their homework checklist each day).
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